How to suffer with joy

This entry is not a "how to suffer with joy", it's a "HOW do you suffer with joy?" Anyone know?

I know I don't. There are days when I feel I can do it. I can sacrifice for others. I can smile on the outside even though I feel sad on the inside.

But there are days like today, I just suffer.

"The Lord loveth the cheerful giver." This quote goes often through my head. Why does He loveth (loves) the cheerful giver?

Maybe because He knows that the cheerful giver is giving all he/she has. Maybe they are "done" and yet still giving. Maybe they are ok with no letting others know their suffering, or how they have been the cause of it, for love of them. The "cheerful giver" has understood love. Maybe that's why the Lord loves them.

I am not there yet. I want to be. I want to be cheerful for my family, I want to create joy, not sadness. I want to help where I can help. I often think what a gift this is that we all have--the opportunity to lighten someone's load, to make their day a little brighter, but we hardly ever do this. That's because it takes a lot of sacrifice and heartache. It means we have to be last. It means we sometimes will be totally forgotten about.

The mystery is in the joy. Or maybe the mystery is in the suffering.